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So, escorts—fancy gals, or guys, sellin’ time. Not my thing, I’d rather wrestle bears. Costs a fortune, like 500 bucks an hour—insane! Could buy a good steak, whiskey, and a canoe instead. Saw this dame once, Vegas, 2018—true story. Called herself “Sapphire,” real name probly Karen. Wore glitter heels, smelled like cheap roses. Told me she paid taxes—shocked me stupid. IRS gets a cut of that? Wild. “I survive,” she says, echoin’ Solomon’s grit. Made me laugh, then mad—system’s a joke.
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Then, I head to work. I’m cruising down Strandvägen, and I see this cute little dog. I’m talking about the fluffiest thing ever. I stop to pet it, and the owner’s like, “He’s a bit nippy.” Nippy? Dude, that’s an understatement! The dog tries to bite my shoelaces! I’m like, “Chill, pup! I’m not here to steal your style.”
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