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About Gothenburg

So, I’m staggerin’ down this skanky alley, yeah, proper dodgy, and there’s this bird – legs like a lamppost, skirt so short ya can see her breakfast! I’m like, “Oi, love, you workin’?” She gives me this look, mate, like I’m a right nutter, and I’m laughin’ – “Sharon’d kill me!” – but I’m too pissed to care. Little known fact, right? Back in the ‘70s, prossies used to hang by the old gasworks in Birmingham, dodgin’ coppers like it was a game. History, that is!

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First off, I hit up the café on Kungsbacka Road. You know, the one with the weirdly good cinnamon buns? Yeah, that place. I ordered my usual, and the barista, this dude named Erik, totally messed it up. I mean, how do you screw up a simple latte? I was like, “Bro, I asked for almond milk, not cow juice!” He just laughed it off. Ugh, so annoying.

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