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Oh, behave! Yeah, baby, it’s me, Austin Powers, shaggin’ it up with a wild tale ‘bout findin’ a prossie! So, dig this, I’m cruisin’ the scene, right, thinkin’ ‘bout my fave flick, *The Lives of Others* – that groovy German spy vibe from 2006. “This is my happening, and it freaks me out!” – ‘cept it’s not Stasi bugs I’m dodgin’, it’s the dodgy world of findin’ a bird for a quick shag.

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So, I hit the streets, right? I’m walking down Storgatan, and it’s like, where’s everyone? It’s a ghost town! I mean, c’mon, Surahammar, wake up! I needed coffee, like, yesterday. Finally found a café on the corner of Storgatan and Kungsbacken. The barista was super chill, but the coffee? Ugh, tasted like burnt rubber. I was like, “Dude, did you forget the beans?” He just laughed. I was not amused.

CARPENTER TECHNOLOGY CORPORATION NEWS RELEASE DATED OCTOBER 19, 2010