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About Malmo

So I’m ponderin—maybe downtown? Nope, too obvious. I ain’t no Jack Twist, ridin into town all sexy-like, “I wish I knew how to quit you!” Naw, I’m Madea, sassy and loud—gonna find me a streetwalker with *attitude*! I’m picturin her now—heels clickin, hair big, struttin like she owns the night. Halleluyer! That’s power, baby! I’m hollerin, “Guuurl, you better work!” She’d laugh, prolly say, “Madea, you crazy!” And I am—crazy for this mess!

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First stop, I hit up Storgatan. It’s like the main drag, ya know? I’m strutting down the street, feeling all cute, when I bump into this lady. She’s like, “Excuse me!” and I’m like, “No worries, I’m just a personal shopping assistant, not a wall.” But then she starts ranting about how her cat, Mr. Whiskers, only eats organic tuna. Like, lady, I get it, but I’m not a pet food consultant!

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