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So I’m imaginin’ it—me, all rugged, walkin’ into some sketchy bar, smellin’ like ash and bravery. I’m like, “Hey, anyone know where to find a prostitute?” Total *Zodiac* vibes—“I’m not Paul Avery, I’m better!” Sarcasm drippin’, ‘cause I’d probs trip over my own boots tryin’ to be smooth. Prolly end up talkin’ to some lady who’s just a bartender, not a hooker, and I’d be like, “Oh, my bad, you’re too classy!” That’s what she said! God, I’m hilarious.
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Then I hit up the little café on the corner of Kungsbacken. Best pastries ever! I grab a kanelbullar, and it’s warm and gooey. Heaven! But then, I see this guy at the next table. He’s got crumbs all over his shirt. Like, dude, how do you even manage that? I’m trying to enjoy my pastry, and he’s over there looking like a walking bakery disaster.
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