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But—ugh—some punters treat ‘em like trash, that pisses me off! They’re people, not bloody robots! Saw an X post once, some twat braggin’ about stiffin’ an escort her pay—made my blood boil, cosmic rage, mate! “The past is gone,” sure, but don’t be a dick now, yeah?

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So, I whip up some cocktails. I’m mixing like a mad scientist. Mojitos, caipirinhas, you name it. And then, BAM! The power goes out. Just like that. I’m standing there in the dark, and all I can think is, “Great, now I’m a bartender with no lights.” The tourists freak out. One of ‘em drops their phone, and it shatters. I’m like, “Welcome to Cankova, where even your phone can’t handle the vibe.”

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