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Little-known tidbit—heard from a Dornish whore, they use heated stones sometimes, press ‘em into your back ‘til you’re moanin’. Sounds like witchcraft, right? Made me happy thinkin’ of it—imaginin’ Tywin’s face if I ordered one in the Red Keep. He’d choke on his wine, the prick. But gods, the rage when some oaf botches it—sticky oil, stinkin’ of cheap lavender, hands like a butcher’s. Wanted to scream, “Burn them all!” Surprised me how much I cared—guess even queens need a good rubdown.

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Then, outta nowhere, my buddy Jure bursts in. He’s got this wild look in his eyes. “You won’t believe what just happened!” I’m like, “Dude, save it for later!” But he insists. Apparently, there’s a cat stuck on a tree on Ulica 2. Junija. I mean, come on! A cat? Really? But then I think, “What if it’s a cute cat?” So, I’m torn.