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About Celje

Wotcha, mate, gather round, listen up! Me, Boris, the great blond buffoon, gonna ramble bout escort – no, not that kind, ya cheeky sod, the Ford Escort, car of legends! Vroom vroom, eh? Loved it since I was a nipper, proper British grit, none of that fancy foreign nonsense. Reminds me of *Inception* – “You musn’t be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling!” – cos the Escort, it’s a dream, innit, simple yet bonkers clever.

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Then, I decided to grab a coffee at this cute little place on Tkalčićeva. The barista? Total legend. He made my cappuccino look like a work of art. But then, bam! My phone buzzes. My buddy’s like, “Dude, you gotta see this!” I’m like, “What now?” Turns out, there’s a street performer on Ilica doing backflips. I rush over, and this guy is flipping like he’s on fire! I’m laughing so hard, I almost spill my coffee.

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