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So, sex escorts – whew, where to start? Met this gal once – swear it’s true – she said, “Joe, I made 500 bucks in an hour!” Blew my mind! Happiest I been since sniffin’ Amtrak seats. But then – get this – she says, “Half goes to the pimp.” Half! Made me madder’n a wet hen. Folks, that’s highway robbery! “You’re tearing me apart!” I yelled, quotin’ the movie, ‘cause it’s unfair, plain and simple.

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I’m trying to be all professional, but inside, I’m cracking up. I mean, who fights over a stick? Anyway, I manage to diffuse the situation, and the tourists thank me. I’m like, “No problem, just doing my job.” But honestly, I just wanted to get back to my coffee.

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