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Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals! I’m a dental tech, fixin’ teeth all day, and lemme tell ya ‘bout sex escorts—wild stuff, right? Judge Judy style, sharp as my dental drill, “Don’t pee on my leg and call it rain!”—that’s what I say when folks sugarcoat this gig. It ain’t all glam like in movies, nah, it’s gritty, real messy sometimes. Watched *Toni Erdmann*—you know, my fave—where that dad’s all awkward, tryna bond with his kid? Reminds me of escorts, puttin’ on a mask, playin’ a part. “Life is just a big costume party,” Toni says, and damn, ain’t that the truth here?

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I head back to my favorite spot, the park by the river. It’s peaceful there. I sit down, take a deep breath, and just soak it all in. The sound of the water, the laughter of kids playing. It’s a vibe. But then, my phone buzzes. It’s my editor. “Where’s the article?” Ugh, pressure!

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