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So, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ – what’s the risk, actuarially speakin’? These gals (and guys, let’s be real) are out there, hustlin’, dodgin’ cops, weirdos, and STDs like it’s a damn video game. Fun fact: didja know sex work’s been around since, like, forever? In ancient Rome, they had “lupae” – she-wolves, how badass is that? – screwin’ in brothels with graffiti ads on the walls. Wild! Makes me happy thinkin’ how humans never change – horny then, horny now, ha!

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But then, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and some guy just knocked over a whole ice cream cart! Ice cream everywhere! I’m talking a total disaster. The poor vendor is freaking out. I’m laughing so hard, I almost drop my phone. Like, dude, how do you even manage that?