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Once met this gal, “Starlight” – her gig name, obvs. Swore she escorted a dude who paid her to read Tolkien aloud. No hanky-panky, just *Lord of the Rings*! Laughed my ass off – genius! Surprised me how quirky it gets. “Sorta like a… long, strange trip,” Doc’d mutter, and he ain’t wrong. Starlight said she banked 500 bucks that night – not bad for nerding out.

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Then, outta nowhere, I get a call about a traffic jam on Ulica Mladosti. Like, seriously? It’s a Tuesday! But nope, there’s a parade. A freakin’ parade! I’m stuck on the phone with some lady who’s late for her dentist appointment. “I can’t be late! I need my fillings!” Lady, I can’t make the parade disappear!