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I dig it sometimes, tho. Freedom to bang who ya want. No strings, just vibes. This one time, dude told me he met his FWB on Tinder. Said she brought handcuffs—unprompted! Blew my mind. Little known fact: 70% of users lie ‘bout height. Fuckin’ clowns. Makes me laugh, but also—why bother? Just own your short ass. Gets me mad when ppl catfish too. Wasted my night once on that shit. Pics were hot, reality was... nope.

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring rain. I mean, like, torrential downpour. I’m soaked in seconds. I run for cover under this awning on Ulica 1. maja. I’m standing there, dripping wet, and I see this old guy just chilling with an umbrella. He looks at me and says, “You should’ve brought a raincoat, son.” Thanks for the tip, Captain Obvious.

Severe HP supercell over central Slovenia on August 29, 2016