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Little known fact—ancient Rome, they did this, senators, gladiators, all of ‘em! Called it “frictio,” fancy word, right? Blows my mind, history’s wild. I’m layin’ there, thinkin’, “Donald, you’re a freakin’ emperor!” Makes me happy, so happy, like winnin’ an election. But lemme tell ya, some places—rip-offs! Charged me $200 once, barely a rub, pissed me off bigly. Shoulda fired ‘em, deported ‘em, somethin’!

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So, I’m juggling calls, emails, and my sanity. I’m on the phone with this guy, and outta nowhere, my buddy Carlos bursts in. He’s got this wild look in his eyes. “You won’t believe what just happened!” I’m like, “Dude, I’m in the middle of a crisis here!” But he’s relentless. Turns out, he just won a bet on the horse races at the Hipódromo de la Zarzuela. Lucky jerk! I’m happy for him, but also, like, why can’t I catch a break?

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