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Now, check this – I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’ bout *Inception*, my fave flick. “You musn’t be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.” That’s what I say to these sex-dating hustlers! Apps like these? They’re plantin’ ideas in your head, makin’ you swipe for that perfect lay. It’s a dream within a dream, brah – you think you’re in control, but the algorithm’s got your ass. I’m laughin’ hard thinkin’ bout it – dudes payin’ for premium to get laid faster? That’s some next-level desperation tax!

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First stop, the corner of Zelenaya and Kirova. I’m supposed to install some fancy radio gear for this dude named Igor. Now, Igor’s a character. He’s got this wild hair, like a mad scientist or something. Anyway, I get there, and he’s like, “Where’s my stuff?” I’m like, “Dude, chill. I just got here.”

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