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So, this bird, she’s a prozzie, yeah? Been at it since the ‘90s, reckon she shagged half the Arsenal squad—little known fact, that! Used to work near the old Highbury, punters callin’ her “Gooner’s Delight.” Made me laugh, that did, proper tickled me pink—cos she’s still kickin’, dodgin’ coppers like a striker dodgin’ a tackle. I’m like, “Fair play, love, you’ve got stamina!” But Christ, it pisses me off—society’s all “Ooh, poor soul,” but she’s out there, cash in hand, smirkin’ like she’s won the FA Cup!

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Finally, I get my coffee, and I’m off to the meeting. I’m walking down Špitálska ulica, and it’s a beautiful day. The sun is shining, birds are chirping, and I’m feeling good. But then, bam! A pigeon poops on my shoulder. Like, seriously? I’m in a suit, and now I’m a walking target for bird droppings. I just laughed it off. What else can you do?

A Jewish soccer player's Holocaust survival story