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Anyways, babe, it’s great for pastures, lawns—zap zap! But don’t be dumb, read the label. I’m yellin’ in my head—PEOPLE, DON’T BE LAZY! Oh, and fun fact—bees hate it. Poor buzzers, makes me sad. Gotta time it right, y’know? Escort’s my jam, but it’s no picnic. Love-hate thing, totally *Moulin Rouge!*—glitz, guts, chaos! Whaddaya think, huh? *Nyyyahaha!*
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After what felt like an eternity, we finally find the dog. He’s just chillin’ under a bench, like he’s on vacation or something. The owner is crying tears of joy, and I’m just standing there, covered in coffee stains, thinking, “This is my life.”
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