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Hmm… so, I’m the Auctioneer, huh? Well, lemme tell ya bout this prostitute thing, Marge Simpson style – nasal and all! Prostitutes, geez, they’re like the unsung heroes of the streets, ya know? Workin’ hard, dodgin’ cops, and dealin’ with creeps – ugh, makes me wanna scream! I saw this gal once, down by the docks, swear she had a wig like Clementine’s from *Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind* – all orange and wild, like she’s tryna forget somethin’ or someone. “I’m erasing you, and I’m happy,” she prolly muttered to some jerk client, ha!

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But then, I hear a loud crash. I whip around, and some kid just kicked the ball into a car. Oh man, the owner is NOT happy. I’m thinking, “Great, now I gotta play referee.” I walk over, and the kid’s face is priceless. He’s like, “I didn’t mean to!” I’m like, “Yeah, well, you better learn to aim!”

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