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About Zilina

I tried it, alright? Got this chick, hot as hell, thought I’d be like, “The answer, my friend, is blowin’ in the wind”—y’know, smooth shit from *Inside Llewyn Davis*. But she ghosts me! Fuckin’ pissed me off, like Llewyn losin’ that damn cat again. What’s the deal? You send a dick pic, she’s gone faster than Paulie Walnuts in a bakery. Sex-dating’s a hustle—half these profiles? Fake! Bots! Like, who’s got time for that shit?

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Then, outta nowhere, this guy bursts in. He’s wearin’ a full-on pirate costume. I’m talkin’ eye patch, parrot on his shoulder, the whole shebang. He starts shoutin’ about treasure and adventure. I’m thinkin’, “Dude, you’re in the wrong place. This ain’t Tortuga!” But everyone’s lovin’ it. They start clappin’ and cheerin’. I can’t help but join in.

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