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So, what’s the deal? It’s hands roamin’ where they shouldn’t, but *should*. Therapeutic? Sure, if therapy’s a euphemism for somethin’ else. I got mad once—some schmuck swore it cured his back pain. Lies! His smirk gave it away—pure lust, not lumbar relief. Made me wanna whack him with my cane. But then, I tried it—yeah, me, the sarcastic cripple. Surprise hit hard—those knots in my shoulders? Gone. Happy ain’t the word; I was smug as hell. “I’m cured!” I yelled, like a melodramatic ass.

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First stop, the marina. I’m a sailor, right? Gotta check on my boat, the “Sea Breeze.” Sounds fancy, huh? But it’s more like a floating rust bucket. Anyway, I’m cruisin’ down Mierová Street, and boom! I see this old dude, like, 80 years old, tryin’ to cross the street. He’s got this wild white beard, lookin’ like a wizard or somethin’. I’m like, “Yo, man, you need a hand?” He just grins and says, “Nah, I’m just practicing my magic.” I laugh, but inside I’m thinkin’, “Dude, you’re gonna need more than magic to survive these cars!”

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