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Hey, buddy, lemme tell ya ‘bout erotic-massage, ya know? It’s wild, man! First off, I was like, “Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, won’t get fooled again!” But this stuff? Totally different ballgame. I mean, it’s not just some rubdown, no sir! It’s, like, sensual, deep, connects ya to ancient vibes, man.

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Then, outta nowhere, I get a text from my buddy. He’s like, “Meet me at the old church on Námestie.” I’m thinking, “Great, more drama!” But I head over anyway. The church is beautiful, by the way. It’s got this old-school vibe, and I love it. But when I get there, he’s not alone. He brought his new girlfriend, and she’s all over him. I’m like, “Dude, I thought we were hanging out?” But whatever, I’m not bitter.

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