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About Martin

So, check this - erotic-massage ain’t just rubbin. It’s old as fuck, ancient peeps did it. Egyptians, Greeks, all them freaky fuckers. Used it to chill, get horny, whatever. Little known fact - them pharaohs had secret oil blends. Smelled like power and pussy, prolly. Gets me hyped thinkin bout it!

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Then, things get wild. A storm rolls in outta nowhere. I’m talkin’ dark clouds, wind, the whole shebang. I’m yellin’ at people to get outta the water. “Yo! Get out! Now!” But some dude thinks he’s a hero, tryin’ to save his inflatable unicorn. I’m like, “Bro, it’s a unicorn! Let it go!” But he’s not listenin’. Finally, I have to jump in and drag him out. He’s soaked, and I’m like, “You’re lucky I’m a lifeguard, or I’d let you float away!”

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