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I tried it once, real talk. Was like, “Aight, let’s see the hype.” Masseuse was chill, but I’m sittin there overthinkin. Like, “Is this cool? Am I a creep now?” Hands hit my back, then lower—oh shit, we’re in it. Felt good, tho, not gonna lie. Happy as hell, muscles all loose, but also—what the fuck just happened? Reminds me of that line, “It’s the little things that kill.” Todd Haynes knew what’s up—pleasure sneaks in, then boom, chaos.

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I decide to wander around instead. I hit up the Banqiao Night Market. It’s packed! I’m weaving through the crowd, trying not to spill my drink. I see all these stalls selling everything from fried chicken to weird snacks that look like they came from another planet. I’m tempted to try the stinky tofu, but nah, I’m not that brave today.

Boys In This Taiwanese High School Can Now Wear Skirts Under Gender-Neutral Uniform Policy