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But dang, the apps now? Grindr, but for, like, that? We’re rollin’ our eyes so hard they might pop out! “Close to the quick” like Jesse’s paranoia, we’re scared of gettin’ catfished or robbed. Typos aside (sorry, rushin’!), it’s a gamble. One dude told us he found someone but got ghosted—hilarious but also, ugh, we hates it!

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Mia’s cracking up, and I’m trying to keep my cool. We’re driving along the coast, and she’s finally starting to relax. I’m like, “See? You got this!” But then, she hits the brakes too hard, and we lurch forward. I’m like, “Whoa, easy there, Speed Racer!”

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