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I reckon escorts are a right pain, mate. Always muckin’ up a good heist. Ye think ye’ve got a fat galleon in yer sights—bam! Out pops an escort, guns hot, an’ ye’re dodgin’ lead like a drunk at a duel. Makes me happy, though, in a twisted way—means the game’s still on, savvy? Ain’t no fun if it’s too easy. Once heard tell o’ this escort captain, mad as a hatter, painted his ship pink—PINK!—to mock us pirates. “Look at me, I’m untouchable!” he’d holler. Bloody lunatic. Worked, though—threw us off, an’ he sailed away laughin’. That’s the kinda mad shite I live fer!

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Then, I wandered down to the Hsinchu Night Market. Oh boy, the food! I could smell the stinky tofu from a mile away. I know, I know, it’s an acquired taste, but I’m all about trying new things. So, I took a leap of faith and bought some. Let me tell ya, it was like eating a sock. A really old sock. But hey, at least I can say I tried it, right?

China ends war games around Taiwan, but leaves door open to more