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Alright, mate, lemme spill the beans—sex-dating’s wild, innit? Dr. Evil style—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars,” I’m schemin’ here! It’s like Uncle Boonmee, yeah? Past lives creepin’ in, all mysterious-like. You swipe right, bam, ghosts of hookups past haunt ya! Sex-dating’s this freaky jungle—apps, sites, total chaos. Tinder, Grindr, whatever—scrollin’ for a shag’s the game. Little factoid: didja know Victorian blokes used coded ads for quickies? Sneaky buggers! Makes me cackle—history’s pervs, same as us.

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First off, I hit up this local breakfast spot on Guosheng Road. I ordered some dan bing (egg crepes) and a cup of soy milk. I mean, who doesn’t love a good dan bing, right? But then, the waiter totally messed up my order. I got this weird tofu dish instead. I was like, “Dude, I didn’t sign up for a tofu surprise!” But hey, I rolled with it. Tofu’s cool, I guess.

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