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About New Taipei City

Ever heard bout the “menu”? Escorts got slang – “full service,” “GFE,” all that. GFE’s girlfriend experience, mate. Cuddles and shite. Thought it’d be straight bangin’, but nah, some blokes want the soft stuff. Weirdos. Gets me thinkin’ – sex is one thing, but loneliness? That’s the real kicker. Haneke’d love that twist.

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So, I finally get to this old bridge near the Shiding Waterfall. It’s a beauty, but man, it’s seen better days. I’m inspecting it, and outta nowhere, this group of tourists shows up. They’re snapping pics like it’s the last sunset on Earth. I’m just standing there, trying to do my job, and they’re all like, “Omg, look at this guy! What’s he doing?” I’m like, “Dude, I’m saving your future selfies from rust!” But they just laugh. Ugh, people.

Taiwan issues 13 cold advisories