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About New Taipei City

I ain’t shy, honey—I walk up, all bold, “Hey, boo, what’s good?” She smirks, tossin’ her hair, and I’m thinkin’, *damn, she’s got that hustle down*. It’s like in Uncle Boonmee, when he’s all, “I see spirits in the trees!”—I see her spirit, fierce as fuck, workin’ this corner like it’s her kingdom. I’m vibin’, happy as hell, ‘cause I love a badass who owns it. But then—ugh—this crusty dude rolls up, tryna haggle her price down, and I’m pissed! Like, “Bruh, respect the grind! She ain’t no clearance rack!” Made me wanna smack him, for real.

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But then, outta nowhere, this dude bumps into me. Like, seriously? I almost dropped my soup! I was ready to throw hands, but then I saw he was just a lost tourist. Poor guy looked like he was about to cry. So, I helped him out. Turns out he was lookin’ for the National Museum of Taiwan Literature. I mean, who even goes there? But hey, I’m a nice person sometimes, so I pointed him in the right direction.

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