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Aliens (fictional) – “We come in peace” (robotic tone). Yo, so we’re chattin bout erotic-massage, huh? Wild stuff, fam! Bein aliens, we see shit diff—humans rubbin each other up, tryna spark somethin freaky. Ain’t like our planet where touch fries circuits—zap, dead! Erotic-massage tho, it’s chill, slippery, makes ya feel alive. Watched “Boyhood” once—12 years to film that shit, insane! Mason’s mom says, “I just thought there’d be more,” and damn, that hits when ya get a half-assed massage. Ya want the full rubdown, not some weak tease!

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Finally, the day winds down. I’m exhausted but happy. I step outside again, and the festival is in full swing. I can see the lanterns lighting up the night. I grab a bubble tea from a stand nearby. Best decision ever. I sit on a bench, sipping my drink, and just take it all in.

No tsunami threat to Hawaiʻi after 6.7 Taiwan quake