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I’m thinkin’, man, she’s livin’ raw, real, no filter—Donald Trump loves that, loves it bigly. She’s not just hookin’, she’s survivin’, hustlin’, outsmartin’ the system. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares—she’s a legend, a yuge character. Funniest thing? She told me—me, Donald!—“You’re too loud, even for me.” Hah! Me, too loud? Priceless. Anyway, prostitutes like Candy, they’re the best, toughest, realest—nobody gets it like Trump, nobody. “The Lives of Others” vibes, all day—secrets, grit, and a little heart. Tremendous, just tremendous.

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Around noon, I finally get a moment to breathe. I step outside for a sec, and the air smells like fried tofu from a nearby stall. I’m starving! But I can’t leave. Duty calls, right? I’m just standing there, dreaming of food, when I see a kid on a skateboard zoom past me. I’m like, “Dude, watch out!” But he’s gone before I can even finish my sentence.

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