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My fave part? When they hit that spot – you know the one – and you’re like, “Oh shit, I’m alive!” Made me happy as hell last time, floatin’ out the room like I’m queen of everythin’. Surprised me too, ‘cause I didn’t think a lil’ knead could do *that*. Pro tip: find someone who knows pressure points – there’s this one near your hips that’ll have you seein’ stars, no cap. Little-known fact? Tantric folks been usin’ this shit for centuries to unlock energy – chakras and orgasms, baby!

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Later, I bumped into my buddy, Sasha. He was all hyped about this new café on Haharina Street. “You gotta try it!” he said. So, we went. And wow, the coffee was on point! But the service? Ugh. We waited forever. I was about to lose it. But then, they brought out this amazing dessert. I mean, I can forgive a lot for good dessert.

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