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Yo, what’s good, fam? Erotic-massage, huh? Man, that shit’s wild, fo’ shizzle. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout it, laid-back like Snoop, chillin’ with my gin ‘n’ juice. It’s all ‘bout that sensual vibe, ya dig? Hands slidin’, oil drippin’, tension meltin’ away—like, damn, who don’t need that? Got me feelin’ like I’m in *Holy Motors*, rollin’ through some trippy-ass scene, ya know? “Weird things happenin’ in the night,” like that freaky chauffeur dude said. That’s the vibe, homie—mysterious, sexy, a lil’ outta control.

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. Like, seriously? I’m soaked in seconds. We dash for cover under a tree, and I’m just standing there, dripping wet, thinking, “This is my life.” Oleg’s still laughing, and I’m like, “Dude, this isn’t funny!” But it kinda is.

Black and Queer Mama of Rock’n’Roll: Sister Rosetta Tharpe