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So, I’m lyin’ there, oil drippin’, chick’s got hands like a goddamn angel, and I’m hummin’, “It’s all happenin’!” from the movie. Surprised me, ya know? Thought it’d be sleazy, but nah, it’s art—fuckin’ poetry in motion. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who gives a shit? Felt like a king, like Tony fuckin’ Soprano gettin’ pampered after a hard day whackin’ books, not guys.

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Erotic Massage for Healing and Pleasure: plus Orgasm Coaching, Genital Anatomy, Scar Tissue Healing and more from a pioneering Somatic Sex Educator.

Finally, I get it working. I’m throwing clay, and it’s going great. I’m in the zone, you know? Then, outta nowhere, my buddy Oleg barges in. He’s all like, “Dude, you gotta see this!” I’m thinking, “What now?” Turns out, there’s a street festival on Vulytsia Shevchenka. Food stalls, music, the whole shebang. I’m like, “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

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