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About Kryvyi Rih

Little known fact—didya know sex-dating’s got history? Old school “lonely hearts” ads, 1800s shit—people been thirsty forever. Newspapers ran ‘em, horny saps writin’ “seeking companion.” Now it’s Tinder, Grindr, same deal, faster pace. Blows my mind, man, how it’s evolved. Gets me pissed too—half these profiles? Fake as hell. Catfish city, wastes my damn time. Had a case—guy sent dick pics, turned out 60, bald, livin’ with mom. Surprised me, sure, but I cackled hard.

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First off, I head down to my favorite spot, the park on Shevchenka Street. It’s got these killer flower beds, and I’m all about that. I’m there, diggin’ in the dirt, when suddenly, this kid runs by, trippin’ over his own feet. I mean, come on, how clumsy can ya be? He knocks over my watering can! Water everywhere! I’m like, “Dude, watch where you’re going!” But he just laughs and runs off. Kids, man.

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