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I ask – “How much?” She smirks. “Depends what ya want.” Classic! Total power move. Surprised me – ballsy chick! I’m sweatin’ now. Palms slippery. “Look, I’m no schmuck,” I say – quotin’ Larry Gopnik again. She laughs – loud! “You’re cute,” she goes. Happy moment – felt like a king! But then – sirens. Cops screamin’ down the block. She bolts – gone! Like Hashem himself said, “Not tonight, buddy.”

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First off, I hit up the local café on Shevchenka Street. You know, the one with the weirdly awesome pastries? I grab a coffee, and boom! My phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, Vova. He’s like, “Dude, meet me at the park!” I’m thinking, “What park?” Turns out, he means the one by the river. The Dniester River, to be exact. Beautiful spot, but I’m not ready for what’s coming.

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