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D’oh! Almost forgot – got this buddy, Lenny, swears he hired an escort for his cat’s birthday. Total lie, but funny as hell! “Look at me, I’m dancin’!” – picturin’ her twirlin’ with a tabby cracks me up. Escorts prob hear weirder tho, like “Take me to the dump” level weird. Bet they got stories that’d make Marge blush!

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Then I head over to the park by the river. It’s a nice spot, you know? People jogging, kids playing, and I’m just vibing. But then, outta nowhere, this dog runs up to me. Not just any dog, but a huge fluffy beast. I’m talking like a bear with legs. It jumps on me, and I’m like, “Whoa, chill, buddy!” Everyone’s staring, and I’m just trying to keep my cool. I mean, I love dogs, but this one? It was like a furry freight train.

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