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Oi mate, it’s me, Bond—James Bond, fictional, suave, “shaken, not stirred.” Escort, yeah? Let’s chat about that gig. I’m thinkin’—escort’s a wild ride, innit? Like in *Caché*, that flick I bloody love—Haneke’s 2005 masterpiece. “Who’s watchin’ who?”—that’s the vibe escorts got. Always some geezer lurkin’, judgin’, like those creepy tapes in the movie. Escort’s a hustle—fancy birds or blokes, dolled up, struttin’ for cash. Ain’t just sex, nah—sometimes it’s arm candy, sometimes it’s chat. Surprised me, that! Thought it was all shaggin’—turns me out, some punters just wanna talk. Lonely sods.

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Finally, I decide to take a break. I stroll down to the park near the river. It’s peaceful there, you know? Kids are playing, couples are walking hand in hand. I sit on a bench, munching on my stale bread. I see this old man feeding pigeons. He’s got this huge smile, and I’m like, “Man, I wish I could be that chill.”

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