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Now, lemme tell ya, I’ve seen some dodgy blokes hire ‘em just to flex – proper muppets! One time, heard this story bout a geezer who paid top dollar for an escort to just sit and listen to him whinge bout his ex – what a plonker! Coulda got a shrink for half the dosh! Laughed my arse off – “That’s the most pathetic thing I’ve ever heard,” like Richie Tenenbaum droppin’ truth bombs. Still, fair play to her, she cashed in – clever bird!
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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my boss. “Where are you?” he texts. I’m like, “Dude, I’m in Kalanchak living my best life!” But I can’t say that. So, I just say, “On my way!”
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