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Favorite flick’s *The Dark Knight*, so picture this—prostitute’s like the Joker, chaotic, unpredictable, struttin’ through Gotham’s underbelly. “Why so serious?” she’d purr, while pickin’ your pocket. Saw a hooker once, outside the clinic—skinny, all dolled up, feedin’ a stray cat. Surprised me, y’know? Thought, “Huh, even the chaos has a heart.” Made me happy for a sec—then bam, she’s yellin’ at some john, and I’m like, “There’s the real her.” Everybody lies, even to themselves.

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After that, I’m feeling pretty good, so I decide to check out the local art scene. There’s this gallery on Kotsyubynskoho Street. I walk in, and it’s all modern art. I’m standing there, trying to look sophisticated, but honestly, I’m just confused. There’s this painting that looks like a bunch of squiggles, and I’m like, “Is this art or did a toddler get loose with crayons?”

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