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About Mykolaiv

Oi, precious, me’s Gollum, yesss, split-mind hissing! Sex-dating, eh? Nasty, tricksy thing it is! Swiping left, right, like chasing shadows. Me likes it, me hates it—arghh! Reminds me of *The Great Beauty*, y’know? “What’s beyond is a lie,” Jep says. Sex-dating’s like that—shiny, empty promises. Profiles all dolled up, pics fake as hobbits’ gold! Met this lass once, said she’s 25—lies! More like 40, wrinkles deep as Mordor’s pits. Made me mad, precious, mad as a warg!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Shevchenka Street. You know, the one with the best coffee? Yeah, that one. I ordered my usual – a cappuccino, extra foam. But guess what? They were outta coffee! Like, how do you run outta coffee? I was ready to throw a fit. But then, the barista, this cute girl, she smiled and offered me a free pastry. I mean, who can stay mad at that? So, I got a sweet bun instead. Not bad, not bad at all.

I'm not asking your permission. Stories of three Ukrainian warriors who died before they were 21