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We shall fight the loneliness, we shall storm the bedsheets with vigor! Thing is, mate, it’s quick—wham, bam, cheers luv—but I’m thinkin, “Was it worth it?” Bit like the film—bleak, raw, no fairy tales here. Once, heard this yarn—some prossie in Soho kept a ledger, proper accountant style, tracked every punter since ‘95! Mad, innit? Surprised me silly—thought they just smoked an shagged all day.

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After that, I decided to stroll down to the central square, where all the action is. There was this street performer, a guy playing the violin. He was good, like really good. I dropped a few coins, feeling generous. But then, outta nowhere, a pigeon pooped on my shoulder. Ugh! I was like, “Really, dude? You had to pick me?” I laughed it off, but inside, I was fuming.

Bail was posted for Mayor Mukachevo, who is suspected of fraud with land