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Oi, mate, yeah baby! I’m groovin’ like Austin Powers, talkin’ bout escort – not the cheeky birds, nah, the Ford Escort, that swingin’ ’60s ride! Loved that motor, proper shagadelic vibes, ya dig? Reminds me of *In the Mood for Love* – slow burn, sexy curves, like Maggie Cheung swayin’ in a tight dress. “I can’t see her tonight,” says Tony Leung in the flick, but me? I’d be revvin’ that Escort to nab her, zoomin’ through Hong Kong streets, yeah!

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Then, I get to the office, and it’s chaos. My boss is yelling about some new regulations or whatever. I’m just sitting there, thinking, “Dude, I’m an actuary, not a magician!” I mean, I can calculate risks, but I can’t fix your life, man!

"My main thought was: "Death, please, not today": military volunteers about the ninth year of the Russian-Ukrainian war