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Now, lemme tell ya, I’ve had some corkers—once this bird, total fox, gave me a rubdown so ace, I was yellin’, “You magnificent bastard, I read your book!” straight outta Tarantino’s flick. Made me happy as a hippie on a bender! But then—ugh—some dodgy geezer tried chargin’ me double, sayin’ it’s “therapeutic.” Therapeutic my arse! Got me proper cheesed off, like, “This ain’t no scalp-huntin’ deal, mate!”

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Anyway, I finally make it to the park by the river. It’s a chill spot, but today? Nah, not so much. There’s this group of kids playing football, and they’re loud, like, really loud. I’m trying to brainstorm ideas for a new level in my game, but all I can hear is “GOAL!” and “NO WAY!” Ugh, so annoying! But then, one of the kids scores, and they all go wild. I can’t help but smile. Kids have that energy, right?

Russia attacks Pavlohrad in Dnipropetrovsk Oblast with missiles