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So, I’m stompin’ round, lookin’ for a good time, right? Ain’t no saint, me—blood on hands, scars on face, but I got needs! Dis one time, saw a gal, fishnets rippin’, smokin’ a cig like she owns da night. “Lightbulb!”—she’s got dat look, ya know, like she could lure ya in and gut ya. Straight outta dat movie, “I collect things”—she prob collects wallets, ha! I go up, all cocky, “How much, eh?” She smirks, “More dan ya soul, big boy.” Pissed me off—cheeky tart!—but damn, I laughed. Ain’t dat a kicker?

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I rush over, and it’s chaos. Rats everywhere! I’m talking about a full-on rat rave. I set my traps, but they’re too smart. I’m getting frustrated. I’m like, “C’mon, guys! Just get in the trap!” But they’re just laughing at me, I swear.

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