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Hiss! Me, Gollum, raspy voice—actuary in Russia, yesss! Findin’ a prostitute, eh, tricky business, my precious! Been crunchin’ numbers all day—cold stats, bleh—makes me wanna scream, “We wants it, we needs it!” Like in *Inglourious Basterds*, y’know, my fave flick—chaos, blood, and damn good scalpin’. So, prostitutes here? Sneaky, precious, sneaky! Ya don’t just stroll Red Square and yell, “Hey, lass, how much?” Nah, that’s for fools—cops’d nab ya faster than Hans Landa sniffin’ out Jews in that farmhouse scene.

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After that, I headed to the market on Kostiantynivska Street. It’s always buzzing with life. Fresh veggies, fruits, and all that good stuff. I was on a mission to find some strawberries. I love strawberries! But guess what? They were sold out! I was like, “Seriously? It’s strawberry season!” I could feel my blood boiling.

Due to the morning shelling by the Russian Federation in the Chernihiv region, some trains will not run.