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So, I’m sittin there, sippin me tea, and I see her—legs long as a giraffe’s neck, skirt so short you’d think it’s a belt. Nature’s a funny thing, eh? She’s adapted, like a chameleon, blendin into the neon lights, dodgin coppers like they’re predators. Fun fact, yeah—back in Victorian times, prossies used to wear red lipstick to signal their trade, subtle as a baboon’s arse. Bet you didn’t know that, did ya? Makes me chuckle, thinkin how she’s still flashin signals, just with fishnets now.

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After that little adventure, I head over to the market on Hrushevskoho Street. It’s bustling, people everywhere, vendors shouting about their fresh produce. I’m trying to find some good tomatoes for my salad. I spot this old lady selling the juiciest ones. I’m like, “Lady, you’re a tomato wizard!” She just smiles, and I’m thinking, “I need to learn her secrets.”

Taras Panat became a priest of the UGCC at the age of 69 | Materials | Ukrainian Greek Catholic Church