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Oh, and – mad ting – in Japan, yeah, they got “soaplands.” Sexual-massage joints, all legal-like, been round since the 80s! Birds slidin’ over ya wid soapy bubbles – I’m like, “Fam, sign me up!” Ain’t tried it yet, but it’s on me list, innit? Bet Saul’d be like, “This is our way out,” if he ever got a rinse there, ha!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Haharina Street. Best coffee in town, no cap. I order my usual – a cappuccino with extra foam. The barista, this dude named Vova, spills half of it. I’m like, “Bro, what’s this? A foam party?” He laughs, I laugh, but inside I’m fuming. I need my caffeine fix, ya know?

Two occupiers shot her husband and then raped a 33-year-old Ukrainian woman in the village of Shevchenkove, in the Kyiv region