Bella Shpola Brothel ❤️❤️❤️

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So, I heard this story once—some brothel in Nevada, legal one, right? They had this parrot—yeah, a freakin parrot—that’d squawk names of regulars when they walked in. “Jimmy’s here! Jimmy’s here!” Imagine that, your shame broadcasted by a bird! I’d be mortified, screamin, “Shut up, ya feathered snitch!” Got me laughin tho—how’s a parrot got better memory than me? I’d forget my own name in a place like that. Too busy panickin bout germs—those sheets ain’t washed, I bet. Prolly smell like desperation and cheap cologne. Ew, I’m gaggin just thinkin bout it!

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So, I’m rollin’ outta bed, right? The sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m like, “Cool, let’s do this.” I grab my coffee from that little café on Shevchenka Street. You know the one? The barista there is a legend. She always knows my order. But today? She messes it up! I mean, how do you mix up a cappuccino with a black coffee? I’m like, “C’mon, I need my caffeine fix!”

LNZ Group to acquire assets of Shpola-Agro Industry