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Escort’s tricky, see. Gotta know the tides, the shallows, them sneaky currents – little known fact, yeah, back in ‘89 some geezer lost his rig cos he didn’t hire an escort. Sank straight to Davy Jones, boat n all! Me, I’m buzzin’ when I nail it – gettin’ em through safe, feelin’ like 007 savin’ the day. But the boredom? Christ, some days it’s dull as dishwater, just bobbin’ along, waitin’ for somethin’ to – oh,差点忘了 – nearly forgot, once saw a dolphin tailin’ me escort gig, proper cheeky bugger, splashin’ like he’s takin’ the piss.

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I ended my day at the local library on Tsentralna Street. I thought I’d chill with a book. But the librarian was on a power trip, shushing everyone like we were in a library from the 1800s. I mean, it’s 2023! Lighten up, lady!