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Oi mate, gather round! Here’s me, Winston bloody Churchill, yammerin’ ‘bout prostitutes like I’m holdin’ court at the pub. We shall fight—oh yes—fight the dreary shadows o’ boredom with a tale wild as a storm! Picture this: a tart, a real dolly, struttin’ the streets like she owns ‘em. She’s no stranger to the game, been at it since God knows when—maybe even when I was puffin’ cigars in Parliament!

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I decide to walk it off, so I head down to the riverbank. The Dnipro is looking pretty today, but I can’t enjoy it. My mind’s racing. I’m thinking about all the things that went wrong. I sit on a bench, and this old man next to me starts chatting. He’s telling me about the good ol’ days in Dobrovelychkivka. I’m half-listening, half-wishing I had a burger in my hand.

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